Tuesday, 9 December 2008

"I'm telling on you"

Four words that make my heart sink as I know I'm going to have to referee yet another bloody disagreement.

Tonight The Beautiful Son and Beautiful Baby Daughter were engaged in their favourite sport of annoy your sibling, my children can do this to Olympic standard and their dedication to perfecting this to an art form is unparallelled.

The bicker this evening was because BBD put the kitchen light off as she left the room but TBS was still in there finishing his yoghurt. This caused some yelling and both of them tear through to moan at me as is their wont. I hate this behaviour, the "I'm telling on you" stuff, I find it tedious and infuriating. BBD reasoned that as I am always telling them to turn lights off when they leave a room, she was just doing as requested, and that TBS didn't need light to eat a frube. I have mentioned before that BBD is also known as Little Miss Last Word and can never be wrong (I wonder where she gets that from ?)

So before the last vein in my head explodes I use my Queen of the Nasty Whisper voice, it's quite scary and they vamoose upstairs, it's a fairly low tone and is usually uttered through a very tightly clenched jaw and goes a bit like this

"foryourownsafetyiwouldrecommendthatyouleavethisroomimmediatelyandfindsomethingtodothatiwouldconsideruseful"

So what do I do then ? I phone my mammy and tell tales on them ! Oh yes, the faults I hate in others are the ones I have in abundance myself. So I have a right old whinge to my mammy about their behaviour and about the fact that no one does anything to help me and how perpetually knackered I am and she speaks to each one of my children and tells them off ! She makes them promise to do more to help me around the house and suitably chastened they disappear to tidy their bedrooms.

So I now know why they persist in telling tales because your mammy makes nice to you, gives you lots of sympathy and sorts it out for you.

ps My mammy is the nicest woman in the world, truly she is, she always finds a good word for everyone, this is my disclaimer, now read what she said to me, this was after I'd stopped whinging and she's told them off, this was when we were having a proper chat

auntiegwen - Gordon's (who I used to be married to, still technically am, but my weans dad) broken his toe. He doesn't know how he did it but I had a look and it's def broken

mammy - is it hurting him then ?

auntiegwen - yeah, he says it's really sore

mammy - good, I hope it's louping (very painful)

That made us both laugh and I felt a lot better, I love my mammy

10 comments:

lisaq said...

Haha...I like mammy! :D

Shirley said...

Well, if your mammy doesn't have your back, who does? That's the way it *should* be. I'm amazed she has enough clout with the weans to get them lined out over the phone. Impressive!

Nota Bene said...

Enough. Just stop. I don't care who started it. If you don't stop I'll finnish it. Now just go to your room.

Mean Mom said...

It's good to have some support from somewhere! My husband often left discipline to me, giving the children the impression that I was the only one 'complaining' and that he didn't necessarily agree with me. It's good for your children to realise that someone else supports and agrees with your actions and disapproves of their behaviour.

Penelope said...

Oooh I know *exactly* what you mean about the "everso hushed but scary voice" I use that one and find it far more effective than yelling - I think the fact that my face is purple at that point scares them too ;o)

Laura said...

So that's having kids off my to do list.

Craze said...

It's always great to have mammy to phone for advice and a little cheering up.

A Confused Take That Fan said...

Awww, I love your mammy too. I do exactly the same. And the arguing already aged 2 and 4 does my HEAD in! I like your growly thing that scares the living daylights out of your children. I am going to try it.

scrappysue said...

and did your mammy say 'i never really liked him' when you guys split? god bless mammies!!!

auntiegwen said...

Lisa - everybody loves her

shirley - she can make them do anything, my kids absolutely adore my parents

NB - alright I'm going

MM - if Gordon tells them off it's always stuff like " don't make your mum more stressed, just do as you're asked" and that pisses me right off, like I can't cope, I think I do feckin well with work and all the kids and all the house, I'd be the best parent in the feckin world if I only had to put in 8 hours on a Saturday.

Penelope - do you have a vein that throbs like mine too ?

Lolly - stick to the MLP's less hassle and infinitely cheaper

Craze - I could not have survived the last 2 years without my parents, I would have gone under so many times

acttf - it's weird some days they get along great and other's it's pure hell

sue - much much worse, she said she was really disappointed in him