Wednesday 28 August 2013

In which all changes

I should have known it, truly, experience should have made me anticipate it. But Lordy Lordy, here we go for another round of all change.

RANTIE AUNTIE ALERT.

My Beautiful Son, light of my life, joy of my heart CHANGED HIS MIND AGAIN

So, Jack has decided to go to uni after all. He got his results, completely as predicted, had made his conditional offer, so thought about it for a day or so and decided to go.

On the plus side - he hadn't informed Edinburgh he wasn't coming, so they were still expecting him

On the plus side again - if he goes to uni, Eldest Beautiful Daughter has a bedroom to come back and be a part time supply teacher in. She is being a part time supply teacher because, and I quote "I AM NOT READY TO BE A FULL TIME GROWN UP YET" (in capitals for emphasis) I am not even thinking worrying about her NQT year. Much.

On the not so plus side, as he took a day or so to decide, he didn't get his first choice of accommodation. He is now looking at private student accommodation, which seems to the untrained mummy eye to offer less facilities for more money.

On the not so plus side again, he hasn't applied to student finance for any money as he didn't think he was going.

On the not so plus side again again, this means I am looking at between £140 - £178 per week just for him to have a bed to lie in, before travel and food and beer. Oh and his tuition fees. I am sincerely hoping his dad will help, otherwise I am going to have to take a part time job on as well as my own to fund this.

I am not worrying about this, this will all be sorted and will be grand. If we all keep saying this, the power of positive thinking will make it soeth.

PS - I really don't do stuff like this often,(I like to think it's because someone reading's child may not have got the results they wanted and I don't want to rub salt in) but allow me a proud Mummy moment, indulge me.

My beautiful baby daughter has had a very troubled last 18 months, properly unhappy and dealing with horrendous issues which have impacted on all of us. But the thing about Lucy is, she has a tremendous force of will, which is a fantastic thing when it's channelled in a positive direction but less so when it allows her to be a gobsh*te of the first order.

She has had a STUNNING set of GCSE results, they would have been stunning if she had been in the easiest 18 months of her life instead of the utter torment she has been in. But to achieve what she did whilst the explosion in the "what the f*ck" factory hit us, has been truly unbelievable. She even got 100% in one of her GCSE's, and none of the other 9 were too shabby either.

Sunday 25 August 2013

In which I fail

A few blogs ago I was moaning that I had applied for a promoted post at work, over 3 weeks later I got an interview for the swanky promoted post.

 I gussied myself up and went to London, mainlining Bach rescue remedy all the way. On arrival, I was told they were running 50 minutes late. This was lovely as it gave me 50 minutes to work myself up to full fat gibbering wreck, not only about the interview but also about how I was going to either miss my non changeable train home and have to pay Gawd knows how much extra to get back but with the added additional bonus of being sat in our head office reception for anyone who knows me to guess why I was there.

 Despite this blog and putting all sorts out on the internet, I find it hugely difficult in real life to tell people stuff, so I hadn't shared with any of my work friends or colleagues that I was even thinking of applying. So you can imagine my delight on seeing the interviewee who was before me leave, and you know it would have to be someone I know well. It filled me with confidence seeing how puzzled they looked to find me there. Why would you schedule internal candidates one after the other? When you are interviewing over 3 full days? Why? That's not kind.

I shall not regale you of how awful it was, as it was truly hideous. Now my head of and my director know I clearly can't function under any level of stress and I have not a baldy about matrix management,  although all my knowledge that fell out of my head during the interview came back miraculously on the train home.

I have, at least, made their decision easier.

Also I don't have to wait till the end of next week as they interview the last of the candidates to find out it's not me. Because the words of my head of, which were meant to reassure "I was really surprised to see your application. It's good to put yourself out there, it means when things come up later on..."

This is good because I still like the job I have.
That's a double win actually as I have a job and I like it.
A triple win as I now have a nice new navy polka dot frock that doesn't make me look like fat Nan the boxer.

Monday 5 August 2013

Things I still don't understand, the 2013 summer remix

My family are annoying and odd, maybe your own beloved family have quirk or 6 too or maybe I am quite alone, Queen of the Oddite tribe. I, myself, have no quirks at all, despite old blogs telling you otherwise, mine are just lovely little things that make me adorable to my family, ahem, as you were...

These are this weeks "Why do they do that's"

Why, in the name of God and all things holy, explain to me...

Why is it my Beautiful Baby Daughter's ambition to dye her hair every colour in the paint chart? It's not even a nice Farrow & Ball chart, it's a nasty chart. Currently it is a wishy washy lilac, necessitating bleaching all colour out with peroxide and then adding dye. She looks like a pensioners blue rinse gone manky. Tis hideous and quite startling to the unsuspecting public.

Why must she always completely ignore the special hairdressers dye towel bought specifically to save my real towels? This time she used my en suite and ruined my White Company bathmat and towels, they have peroxide patches and look quite affronted and unaccustomed to such treatment, they are from the White Company and live in my bathroom, with the clean and tidy people. She can't see that there is a problem with a piebald mat and towels, they still work, you may have heard my reply to that smart a*se comment, you may have heard in quite clearly, even if you live in a different county, nay even country to me. And are deaf.

Why does The Beautiful Son think he is on holiday and can lie in till 4pm? If he's not going to university in September, he's UNEMPLOYED (in capitals for emphasis) and

Why does he think that fiddling about on the internet for an hour a day looking at jobs online is job hunting? Not in my book it's not, job hunting is getting your a*se and face vertical and outside of a bed and ASKING (ICFE) or begging people to employ you.

Much as it pains me to say it, as a mere newly wed I don't like to criticise the lovely mr auntiegwen, but The Beautiful Husband has some odd stuff going on too, maybe he caught it from us?, I know not but

Why does he wait until he is turning the corner AND changing gear to put his seatbelt on? Why not do it before you start driving, when you are not trying to do 2 other things as well, some people are more suited to multi tasking than others, he is not one of the chosen ones. I don't want him to die and leave me with them children, I know they're mine and all but I need someone on my team. And a little teeny tiny other thing...

Why must The Beautiful Husband ignore the hand soap at any of the 4 sinks in the house and use the washing up liquid in the kitchen? We have much more liquid soap than washing up liquid (ratio 4-1, in fact) and when we run out I can't quite bring myself to use Dove/carex/whatever is on special offer at the supermarket instead of the Fairy liquid on dishes.

Now please feel free to add your own "Why do they do that's" of your own in the comments, we may even have a prize for the oddest of them. I don't expect it would be an exciting prize but I am happy to come and give out to your nearest and dearest, I am only spectacularly ineffective in my own home.