Friday, 5 August 2011

Crime and confession

This morning as I waited for the kettle to boil, I noticed that the chopping board was in the wrong place, oh yes Miss Marple has nothing on me, even before coffee. As I moved the board, there was a sheet of paper addressed to me covering this. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you exhibit A - the crime, a very peculiar stain upon my white worktop.



Exhibit B - the confession


The bit you can't read at the end is a list of things they've tried...
fairy liquid, dettol, baking powder, flash, cif, cilit bang and water

I do love Joe, yes, this is the same Joe who had the party in which his mother's and his dead great granny's wedding china got broken but he does dress up as Santa when I need one for my parenting skills group's Christmas party, he must get kudos for that.

And when he refers to the cute note, he means this, exhibit C -



the sorry note (which I kept as he made me hoot with laughter) when he broke my outside light and indeed it was fixed by Joe Cryor.

So, when people tell you children get less messy and break less stuff as they get older, and you're thinking that you, one day, in the fullness of time, can have a lovely home stuffed to the gunnels with White Company and Cath Kidston, don't bank on it before they're 36 or so.

17 comments:

Andy said...

Might *HAVE* worn off. Sigh, kids today. Etc.

Joe sounds like a top bloke. Do you think I could get an invite to the next party (not that there was one, I'm sure) please?

Betty-thewoodfairy said...

Hmm Miss Marple: you seem to have missed the 'we' in the letter - I think your dear daughter is the guilty party here (how many hot boys drink wine?) - Joe is taking the punishment for her as they both know you will go much easier on him than on her .... you will have to train them both in stain removal as this is likely to be a recurring (party) thing - or else buy many chopping boards.

Gigi said...

I have to wonder just how much business he sends to Joe Cryer.

Nota Bene said...

Yes lovely. Sweet. Charming. Now shoot him.

A Woman Of No Importance said...

Splendid - What fun! I'd recommend neat fairy liquid applied over the whole stain straight from the bottle, thickly - Leave it overnight to see if if lifts the stain out - I've had some success with that method in the past...

Good luck, ma belle - I thought the pristine house on your return was too good to be true - We're talking teenagers here, right??! xxx

Working Mum said...

I will never have that type of house unless husband leaves as well!

Looking for Blue Sky said...

Oh dear, I'm sorry that there was more.. But you've got to love those notes, i couldn't get angry x

Mrs Worthington said...

I predict a weekend of finding things in wrong places covering up more stains etc

pinklea said...

When I came home from my vacation, the sliding door to the laundry was hanging off its track. Darling Daughter "had no idea" how it happened, it "just did". To be fair, she was extremely contrite, but I think I might have preferred one of Joe's notes - at least that's funny!

Alienne said...

The note is really sweet, even if the grammar is poor. You can't be cross with someone who writes notes like that! It took me weeks to track down things that got put in the wrong place when I left a teenager alone; and said teenager had no idea how the towel rail so mysteriously broke in my absence.

libby said...

The bedroom? your posh bedroom... that was all ok wasn't it????
and I am so glad Andy did the of/have thing, as that made me sigh too...and Betty is right...Joe didn't work alone!

Rare Lesser Spotted said...

At least he wrote a note!
XX

scrappysue said...

hey wendy! getting ready for your 29th birthday again this week!?!?!?!! see, i haven't forgotten! been catchingup on all the comings and goings and what passes for entertainment in chez auntiegwen's house. i have just one question: who is joe???

Kelloggsville said...

Its just that the hand prints and breakages are now higher. Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose

Sandi said...

Ok, is Joe Hot Boy and is Joe Cryer someone different??? I am confused, it doesn't take much I know, but!!
Love the note, hope you can get the stain out.

Oooh is it your birthday soon??? If so HAPPY BIRTHDAY, if not just disregard that :)
xx Sandi

Laura said...

I love exhibit C letter the best.

How will you get the stain out?

The Girl Behind said...

Gorgeous letters - I'm voting for forgiveness here. There's a lot to be said for someone owning up, albeit covering it up with a chopping board!

I work with young people and we have a hostel on site. Legend has it that one of them walked past the radiator in his bedroom one evening and it just fell off the wall!