Wednesday, 14 September 2011

More teenage boy stuff

Just because your boy has grown to 6 foot 2 doesn't mean he's grown up in anything other than a physical sense.

The Beautiful Son had a sore throat, it was so painful that we had biscuits and crisps in our house that survived more than a day, which was unheard of. I told him to go down to the doctors and make an appointment. Our surgery insists you present yourself in person (or a representative if you are too ill to leave home) at their reception desk at 8am to make an appointment. They won't do it by phone, I am sure there were communist bread queues shorter than we have at our surgery.

TBS insists he can't go by himself, so off we go and make his appointment. We get one for 9.10 am, so we go back home for an hour. He insists I have to back with him too. I enquire would he still want me there if it was for a sore bum, he assures me I'd still have to show up for that. As he put it "you're my mum, of course you'd have to come, I can't deal with doctors on my own" I just pray he never gets an STD.

The doctor diagnoses tonsillitis, prescribes antibiotics and says if things don't improve in 48 hours to return for a blood test to rule out glandular fever. He also remarks on TBS being an infrequent attender. TBS felt slightly put out, a bit like he'd been shirking.

Of course TBS can't go to the chemist by himself, I have to take him there too. I tell him he can't take alcohol whilst on them. I elaborate by telling him that mixing alcohol with antibiotics causes diarrhoea, and it's so fast acting most people don't get to the loo on time. I wonder if I can still get away with him believing everything I say if I use my mummy's never wrong tone, will it still work? I see no signs either way.

Later I overheard him tell his friend Johnny "nah, I'm not drinking at Rachel's party, no chance I want to cack myself"

The last word goes to me, we all know how I like the last word. Scuse me whilst I throw my head back and laugh like a muscateer.

23 comments:

Trish @ Mum's Gone To ... said...

That's a brilliant wheeze, telling him porkies like that!


At my husband's practice they have an old-fashioned open surgery every morning - you turn up from 8am, scribble your name down, take a seat and wait to be seen. You might have to wait a bit but it works really well - and if you don't want to wait you can book an evening appointment instead. I know he's my husband and I love him and all that but it surprises me not many practices round our way do this.

Alienne said...

That's a cracker; I couldn't have got away with that though, my two are a bit too clued up for that.

Kelloggsville said...

oh yes, THE master...score one to mother

auntiegwen said...

Trish - lying to children is what I do best. I think your hubby's surgery has the right idea, I am currently doing training with GP's in your county, I often wonder if your hubby is there

A - because they're girls most probably

S - I had to get one over on him/them EVENTUALLY !!!

mannanan said...

Love it!!!!!

If I Could Escape said...

As the mother of a teen son, I can totally relate. That's hilarious. Hope he's all better now.

auntiegwen said...

mananan - oh yes, occasionally I get the last laugh

iice - oh yes, we have no biscuits to prove it :)

Gigi said...

HA! I regularly lie to my son as well. You should have seen his face when I began to describe just what they would have to do to him for his recent x-ray....it was hilarious.

And if I had to go through all that just to get a doctor's appointment, I'd never go! We can call and set our appointments up. Of course, the appointment is pretty much worthless as you usually don't see the doctor until at least an hour later.

Trish @ Mum's Gone To ... said...

Picture the scene...
I mention to husband that I have a blogging pal who is training GPs and wonders if she may have trained him.
"Oh, ok, what's her name?"
"Auntie Gwen"
"Right"

So where and what have you been training so I can delve deeper?

auntiegwen said...

Gigi - oh it's a real pain over here but it is at least free to all

Trish - I haven't been to Spalding yet but I live in hope :)

Ayak said...

You are so good at this...wish I'd been able to lie like this to my kids when they were younger. It would have saved me so many problems

Nota Bene said...

You are evil.



Well done!

auntiegwen said...

Ayak - my son used to believe everything I said, sometimes he still does :) long may it last

NB - mwahahaha

Mrs Worthington said...

I love it when they fall our fibs. My teenage son does the same. I hope no body dispelled your theory of cacking pants though

libby said...

Always listen to your mother....she knows best....mine is still telling me that, and I tell my kids that...if you repeat something often enough doesn't it become true? .........I'm thin and rich, I'm thin and rich.......

auntiegwen said...

Mrs W - I think all of Jack's friends now believe it :)

L - I will try your rich and thin mantra too

Jon Storey said...

Brilliant! Incidentally I should equip yourself with some latex gloves and a pair of tweezers, you can't be too careful with these STD's !! :)

Taz said...

My 16 year old is the same, goes off for a month to live in a tent in Africa but can she go to the Drs on her own? Can she buggery!

Looking for Blue Sky said...

Will definitely use that line :)

SueAnn said...

Oh that is just wrong...funny...but wrong!! Ha!!! Cracked me up for sure!!
Hugs
SueAnn

auntiegwen said...

Jon - oh the mental imagery that throws up, bleurgghhh

Taz - oh yeah the minute they need to do anything useful for themselves/you they revert to being weans again

LFBS - thinking of doing an auntiegwens guide to lying to your children

SueAnn - that's me wrong wrong wrong but sometimes a mummy's got to do what a mummy's got to do

Persephone! said...

Sorry about the sore throat, but big big pat on the back to you for the ruse! I am impressed.

Our surgery we can still phone in the morning first thing for an appointment, in fact now its the only way, no making appointments in advance.

auntiegwen said...

P - it seems like it's only our surgery that has this bizarre system