Friday, 31 July 2009

Why I avoid the gym

Now you may remember a little while ago I told you that my bosoms were expanding at an alarming rate, well the rest of me has caught up with them.

I am getting fat.

So to the gym I go. Like all normal people I pay my money but don't actually go. It's in the school I was a teacher at.

I was only in the place about 2 minutes when the manager guy comes up and exclaims his surprise at seeing me there as as he puts it "That's the first time in 2 years I've seen you here"

This is a lie, I took both the year 12 AS and the year 12 Btec group there to do a risk assessment as part of their course.

I smile politely and start torturing myself on the cross trainer. He follows me round a bit and chats. I don't do chat at the gym, I have to take my ipod out and I am not best pleased. He tells me how he sees me at school and how he knows I'm a member but don't go. He tells me how he thought "Don't know what she's doing but she looks good on it". He follows me to the thigh machines, I can't remember how to adjust the chair, he shows me and tells me how if I went regularly I'd know that.
He remarks on my inner thigh strength. I am getting more than a little annoyed and faintly disturbed. He follows me to the treadmill and then the mat where I do some sit ups, critiqued by him. He tells me how good I look for my age "You're 42 right ?" I am seriously creeped out.He follows me downstairs and as I am scanning my card to leave, he tells me to make sure the card is a good 6 inches away, he give me what he thinks is a suggestive wink. He tells me how mature women know what they want from life.

I resist the urge to throw back my head and cackle, I know nothing matey, except I will be finding a new gym.

Pronto.

12 comments:

Nota Bene said...

Pervert at the gym? Surely not...next time try finding one with a really nice cafe to eat cakes after your work out. And then pop round the corner for a sneaky fag

lisaq said...

Ugh! Creepy, creepy, creepy! Yikes! Time for a new gym I think.

Kirsten said...

Ha. I seriously L.O.L.'d... I don't say that very often.

I wonder if he truly thought he was getting somewhere with you.

Mean Mom said...

Yeuch! You really do need to find another gym not to go to!

scrappysue said...

FREAKY and CREEPY!!!

Laura said...

What a horrible and creepy guy. At least he gave you some compliments though even creepy people can be nice sometimes :O)

auntiegwen said...

NB - I only do sneaky smokes when I'm drinking and I haven't had a cake for weeks, I am a lardy auntie and a bit grumpy too (lack of cake)

Lisa - I know but I get it at such a subsidised rate as I'm on the staff membership and I feel that as I never go, I am wasting less money as it's cheap. Did you get that logic ? Yep, I know, I'm mad as a box of frogs

Kirsten - hey, how's you ? I wonder if he thinks just because I am old I'd be grateful for the attention ? I'm not, I'd rather be single and eat cake ergo the need for the gym, my life is just a viscious circle non ? Watch and learn from your auntie's mistakes honey x

MM - I know but they're dear and I only go once every 2 years

Sue - oh he is and you should see the cut of him, as if !

Lolly - are you getting some Pollyanna by osmosis from me ? You'll be able to take over when I go on my jollidays x

Matthew said...

Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Very much appreciated, so I thought I'd repay the courtesy.

Gym..... yuck. It's on my list too and I suppose I should get around to joining up eventually.

As for being hit on at the gym, I can't help thinking he's taking "no pain, no gain" too far...

Working Mum said...

Creepy. Time to get Wii Fit I think. We got one this week and I'm aching all over from skiing, boxing and baseball.

A Woman Of No Importance said...

This gym, Gwennie? Where is it??! Not that I'm desperate or anything... Cougar? Moi?!

...Seriously creepy though! Take care, Fhi x

Madame DeFarge said...

One wonders at the qualifications he needed for the job, other than superb interpersonal skills.

sixpence said...

FAT????????????

Don't think so!!

Now THIS is fat (*grabs handful of muffin top and flaps it at screen*)