Monday, 19 April 2010

I had a very technologically trying day

I am usually a happy wee scone on Mondays. I laze around whilst offspring are at school, I stay in jammies eating chocolate and then I pretend I've been working. I am usually very happy to be clickety clickety on the internets. Not today.

Today I tried and failed to order a new garden table from Marks and Spencer, the one I want is out of stock.

Today my google reader thingy is completely blank, this means that when anyone I have on my bloglist posts I don't know they have, I like to know this, I like to read your posts, I'm not ignoring you, honest.

I absofeckinlutely hate the student finance section of directgov, my child is putting in her correct passport details, we have the feckin thing in our sweaty mitts, we can't go any further in the application process and we are now both bored to death with it.

If she cannot access this, she will be unable to obtain a tuition fee loan, I am now strongly considering naked ironing, apparently you get £35 an hour for it, just hook your web cam up and away you go. I fear I will be a bad parent if I insist on her making erotic films, even though there has been a demand. Naked ironing seems like a good compromise.

I was going to write about my celebrity shag list, I have spent quite a long time trying to find naked pictures of David Tennant today. I have failed, I did see one of him partially covered but the bit that was covered was the bit I'd be partial to.

I will try and post my celebrity shag list tomorrow, I fear I may have already told you this a few years ago so if I have please just pretend you don't remember and act surprised.

17 comments:

Brighton Mum-Teenage Angst said...

Well, I'm flabbergasterdly astounded that you'd want to shag David Tennant! There, was that surprised enough for you?? Tee-hee. I'm sure you could you do a little photoshoppy thing with the partially covered bits of Mr Tennant, couldnt you?

slommler said...

You crack me up!! Yes use photoshop! That should fix you right up.
LOL
Hugs
SueAnn

katyboo1 said...

Post it soon. I am still in agony and you are my only hope, obi wan.

Muddling Along Mummy said...

You can get £35 an hour for naked ironing? So basically you're bring paid to do your chores? Hmmmmmm could be onto something here lol

Hope tomorrow is les frustrating

auntiegwen said...

BMTA - yep but you know really that learning how to use photoshop is difficult because of my can't be arsed gene.

SueAnn - far too technologically sophisticated for the likes of lazy old me.

Mrs Boo - ouch poor you, if I was your only hope, you know you'd be disappointed don't you, Katie? Much better to rely on proper bloggers with fancy twiddly blog bits

M a M - and in addidtion to the already cunning plan, I thought I'd take in other peoples ironing, charge then £10 quid an hour, lots of ironing to do means lots of webcam time. I know, I really should be running the treasury instead of messing around looking to find naked pictures of David Tennant.

libby said...

How do you know its £35 an hour?
Y'know I believe you can also get lots of dosh from 'talking dirty' on the 'phone....imagine..all those people wanting to hear 'that oven needs a good going over, those windows are filthy and I really must run a mop over this...'

auntiegwen said...

Libby - we could have a nice wee business going on there, niche market and all... I mean, you've got to send one to uni this year too...

Muddling Along Mummy said...

Hahaha love it - take in ironing and get paid twice to do it! Now are you taking on others??

Jacey said...

You are clearly not looking hard enough:

http://www.tongs.org.uk/files/DT.jpg

Ayak said...

I've just found your blog because I noticed you had added yourself to my Followers...thankyou for that...I am returning the compliment and will be back to read some more xx

Kitty Moore said...

David Tennant? I'm disappointed! Looking forward to the rest of your celebrity shag list!

Lena said...

Directgov applications are a nightmare, Gwen. I waited for ages for some tax credit bollocks and almost lost Ross the funding.

Naked ironing......? As long as the iron is better behaved than mine. Spits at you for no reason - something like a friend I used to have...lol

Looking forward to the shag list. David Tennant was second on my one a few years ago, and sadly he's a bit further down the list now. Get that naked pic and I'll up him (ooooooh, what a thought) a bit further......*phew*

auntiegwen said...

M a M - oh yes, as soon as we have the naked ironing thing going, I'm thinking of expanding

Jacey - and people say there's no God

Ayak - merhaba, I'll look forward to reading about your life in Turkey

Kitty - no likey the divine David???? all the more for me then :)

Lena - ooh, I'm interested in who knocked him off your top spot now

Kelloggsville said...

But given the level of technical difficulties surely webcam naked ironing is going to be hit by constant loss of income due to down time, in order to compensate surely you must also cover the 'in-house' service for the more local customer. I've seen naked male cleaners advertised, why not naked female ironers - if you start franchising give me a call!

auntiegwen said...

Kellogsville - very wise insights my dear, certainly, you can join me and Libby as we attempt to fund our girls through uni.

Jon Storey said...

The Children's Mother pays me £40 per hr to keep my kit on while I am ironing.....

auntiegwen said...

Jon - I'm sure she doesn't, I'm sure she's just grateful she's getting her ironing done :)