Wednesday, 2 March 2011

If I was on Twitter...

It would say

Monday evening - drive to B and Q in Northampton to buy 2 rolls of wallpaper for feature bedroom wall. Returned empty handed as they only had 1. Also v peed off at Waitrose as they had no fig and walnut bread. Oh the deprivation (hear that in Billy Connolly's voice)

Tuesday afternoon - spend gazillion hours trying to source said 2 rolls of feature (in my head now another f word) wallpaper. Find that Coventry B and Q has some. Drive to Coventry with TBS, on leaving the car TBS has pins and needles and waddles into shop looking like a constipated penguin (due to jeans hanging off arse showing feature pants)

Tuesday evening - as TBS had already fulfilled his helpfulness quota that day by sitting beside me in car and misdirecting me, I had to wash down all walls in bedroom ALL BY MY OWN SELF.

Wednesday afternoon - spend far too much time on The White Company website trying to convince myself that £400 for bed linen is a perfectly reasonable amount and I really deserve a cashmere throw. And silky velvety cushions. Some of you may be pleased to know I resisted temptation. For now. That website should have a middle aged lady addiction warning on it.

Wednesday evening - should be painting the bedroom ceiling. Instead am wasting time on here pondering the fact that my son has twitter and my mother has facebook. And I don't even have a cashmere throw. Oh the deprivation.

21 comments:

Rare Lesser Spotted said...

I love the description of TBS and his dress sense, makes me laugh (sorry) it genuinely looks really funny - my nephew in law (21) dresses just the same.

"...gazillion hours..." I've told you millions of times about exaggerating.
xxx

Expat mum said...

I have stripped the Man-Child's bedroom of gorgeous (but far too young apparently) baseball themed paper, in readiness for two-tone black striped wallpaper.
I can wallpaper quite well, there are no quirky things to cut around on the walls. I just can't summon up the energy. Help...

Working Mum said...

I know a few websites that should have a middle aged lady addiction warning - does Tesco Wine Warehouse count?

Andy said...

£400 for bed linen?!

You need to think about your priorities. You could get an iPad for that.

:-)

Kelloggsville said...

I think you needed to add the hashtag #firstworldproblems !

£400 for bedding !!!

Betty said...

Since your bedroom posts began I have noticed my curtains are ten years old and faded, never taken up to the right length... the bedroom ceiling has patches where I missed last time painted 5 years ago ... the bed has no wheels, taken off long ago as they used to catch my toes and now drawers are impossible to open without coathanger due to being on the floor, the wardrobe doors whilst very lovely mirror are very heavy and keep falling out of the frame if I open them more than 4 inches and - yes - I would quite like a new bedroom please ... but Aunty Gwen, I will forgo the cashmere throw and cuddle the cat instead - far cheaper.

auntiegwen said...

Steve - he is a bonny looking ticket right enough, I'm sure in years to come he'll be mortified :) xxx

Expat Mum - oh I never have energy but it's amazing what having the carpet fitters and furniture arriving does to your normal level of procrastination!

WM - no, that's medicinal, taken daily helps your health, you're welcome

Andy - but an ipad won't keep me warm at night. Don't you try and turn nice lady things maths into blokey maths. This is a pink blog, for ladies, the middle aged variety especially welcome.

S - I am such a sucker for The White Company, I love it, love it, love it! In my defense I have never bought anything full price from there though.

Betty - now I've started on the bedroom I can see how shabby the whole house is!!! Now if I can just find a good person to make curtains for me, I'll be laughing :) xx

Sandi said...

MMMMMMM, cashmere, I am sure there is an althernative that is cheaper, looks and feels the same and no one need to know.
Ah yes the 'under bum' jeans, its a world wide phenomenon (had to spell check that word)Who starts these things I wonder!!!
x Sandi

Gigi said...

Oh love - I just told you how to do curtains! ;-)

You really need to get on twitter - these types of tweets would keep me vastly amused while I'm supposed to be working . . . .

Nickie @ Typecast said...

Do Twitter!! I will hold your hand :D You can now tweet more than 140 characters with Tweetdeck so you don't have to stop typing mid-sentence. I LOVE IT!!

I don't understand The White Company.

mannanan said...

Brilliant blog today!...made me laugh out loud which was a rwal tonic seeing as I'd only just come out of a meeting with my manager at midnight. Thank you....htough I do think £400 for sheets is rather excessive

Curry Queen said...

Don't listen to them - listen to the voices in your head! The ones going "£400 for sheets and a cashmere throw is entirely reasonable - buy the whole White Company NOW!" And what is it with teenage boys and their arses constantly hanging out of their keks? Mine is exactly the same....walks like John Wayne most of the time...

libby said...

Go for the bedstuff...it's where you spend a lot of time remember and you are worth the good stuff.

auntiegwen said...

Sandi - there is always an alternative, as for the jeans I beleive it was bad boys in jail that had their belts removed that started that craze. My middle class heart swells with pride when I see my "had the best of everything" son emulating that trend.

Gigi - yep I do need to try and do curtains, actually the tieback fabric you used would go perfectly, if I send you the measurements be a love and knock me up some curtains when you are meant to be working. Your boss would never notice!

Nickie - ooh lovely, I warn you I am a technological numpty and your gin consumption might rocket.

The White Company is a middle aged middle class cult and I have been sucked right in.

Mannanan - ooh meeting at midnight, have you joined the secret service? the £400 is for the cashmere throw and 1 cushion cover! If I added the 2 housewife pillow cases, the 2 oxford pillowcases, 1 fitted sheet and 1 duvet cover it would add a whopping great £365 to the bill.

CQ - £400 will only but the throw and the pillowcase. I think every teenage boy in the land has their arse on display, I suppose if you spend £20 on pants you want the world to see them!

Trish @ Mum's Gone to... said...

I'm with Libby - luxuriate in your bedding. I've never regretted our Hungarian goose down duvet: a few months of only eating gruel and your pocket will never notice.

Looking for Blue Sky said...

Please please join twitter, and then you could follow Andy's advice and get an iPad (a brand new white one to match your bedroom even) so you can keep us all entertained wherever you are :)

auntiegwen said...

Libby - oh thank you sweetie, I may ask for vouchers for my birthday, that'd help :) shame it's not for months :(

Trish - ooh that sounds tres tres exotic. I wonder if I could persuade the children?

LFBS - oh you love your ipad don't you? another thing that'd be great if I had endless money, champagne taste beer income thats me!!! xx

slommler said...

You are definitely deprived!! And since I have the "gene" that wants everything right now!! I feel your pain.
Hugs
SueAnn

auntiegwen said...

SueAnn - ah yes, impatience is my middle name

Neil said...

Too many characters... Tsk!

auntiegwen said...

Neil - very poor form, I know