Monday, 30 August 2010

Only in my life

Friday night saw my kitchen table groaning under several bottles of alcohol. I remarked to Hot Boy "Someone has a big night planned" and then Hot Boy replied that he and Eldest Beautiful Daughter were going to have sex on the sofa.

Just before I had a stroke, EBD pointed out it was the name of a cocktail. One of the few times in my life I was actually glad that my daughter was going to be drinking copious amounts of alcohol. And not having sex on my lovely sofa.

The next morning saw the kitchen contain myself, EBD, Hot Boy and the ex mr auntiegwen who had come to collect The Beautiful Son and Beautiful Baby Daughter. TBS wandered in and said in his very old man Scottish accent (yep, he's still doing that and sadly, I still find it funny) "All right Hot Boy, did you and her have your sex on the sofa last night?" and then Hot Boy saying "I did but she was too tired, she just went to bed"

It's actually quite amusing to watch what must have been your own reaction on someone else's face. Poor ex mr auntiegwen he must worry about his children, left in my care.

20 comments:

DJ Kirkby said...

Ah how funny! Our two eldest are giving us many moments like this and we are aging rapidly in the process!

Laura said...

hehehe! This post made me giggle so hard! I love your family, it's like a white Cosby show.

Ayak said...

Oh I love it! And I know I wouldn't have been able to have resisted saying that too!

Mud in the City said...

Fablous! I think we should invent some more of those cocktails for family amusement....

'nookie in the shower'? 'rumpy-pumpy in the wardrobe'? 'a swift seeing to over the kitchen table'?

Just to greet guests with, hosiptable-like....

libby said...

Can imagine it very well Auntie!but he need have no concerns...you are a wonderful mother. ps I like Muds idea...making up a cocktail....will give it thought...and testing.....

Rare Lesser Spotted said...

Trouble is, I'm at an age where I think I'd prefer the cocktail :(

Gigi said...

I can just imagine the look on his face.....

Mrs Yappy Dog said...

what have I been missing? a whole chapter of my life I think - cocktails - no wonder I don't like alcohol, I haven't discovered it properly - I need to invent something - mine is going to be called 'barking at the moon' and will contain dark rum and some chocolate liqueur with something fizzy, cava perhaps? and a dash of blackcurrant - yum.

Autumn Mist said...

Just totally LOL! It must have been well worth it. I suppose it's marginally better than Sex On The Beach. What you do in the privacy of your own home, 'n all that!

Nota Bene said...

Oh. I've just peed my pants...

Working Mum said...

Classic! And so cruel; hope you filled ex Mr AG in on the joke.

slommler said...

It is good to make him worry! Ha!
Thanks for the hearty laugh!!
Hugs
SueAnn

Expat mum said...

That would be the sweetest revenge. If that's what you wanted, that is.

Troy said...

Slightly confused...was it the having sex or was it being on the "lovely sofa" that nearly caused the stroke?

auntiegwen said...

DJ - I would have not a wrinkle or a grey hair if it weren't for my children

Lolly - that's one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me :)

Ayak - if you know Hot Boy you'd understand, he has no concept of what not to tell, he is actually likely to tell me everything

Mud - absolutely, I'm definitely coming to your next party :)

Libby - I'll look forward to tasting, I'll come on the train to take full effect

RLS - no shame in that, nice to know you've got the choice :)

Gigi - he was so shocked and quite confused, he's not quite as used to Hot Boy as the rest of us

Mrs Y - sign me up for your next party too :) sounds yummy

Autumn - in the privacy of MY home although Hot Boy seems to have just about moved in, just as well we like him

NB - I have my hand up as I type, and having met Hot Boy you know he would tell something like that

WM - we did but he still looked quite perturbed, it was much easier when she hadn't discovered sex and alcohol

SueAnn - my life is greatly amusing if you don't have to live it xxx

Expat Mum - no, I still really like the ex, he made me a big pot of carrot and coriander soup at the weekend, he's a great ex, I'm crap I never make him anything

Troy - I like to live in mummy denial land where my children don't have sex or drink alcohol, it's nice there, don't take my happy place away from me :)

what happened ?how did i get HERE? said...

Love it, love it , love it!!!! Made me laugh out loud! Mxx

Ayak said...

Just noticed your comment on Blogger Help. Some other followers were experiencing the same problem. I seem to have fixed the problem because they can post now. Can you give it another try? Aaargh...I hope this isn't going to keep happening...it's so annoying!

family Affairs said...

Ha ha - just love teenagers.....Lx

Madame DeFarge said...

It's enough to drive a woman to be teetotal. Such shenanigans amongst the young. Let's hope they used straws.

auntiegwen said...

M - God I know, it's just as well I find my life funny too otherwise I'd have to be medicated!

Ayak - it still won't let me comment, I tried this morning :( x

L - I do, even though I'm living an episode of skins x

Madame - always good to be properly protected