My little cyber shelf of nice things

Despite being hugely crap at passing on awards, tags and meme's I am lucky enough to get them. I really do appreciate them but my huge "I'm not worthy" complex seems to make it difficult for me to display them, so they go on my little cybershelf of nice things.

Pathetic creature that I am, I'm scared I'd hurt someones feelings if I didn't tag or award them, so please consider that any award/tag/meme that's around on my blog as yours if you'd like them. What's mine is yours, with the exception of fruit and nut toblerones and David Tennant, obviously.

The very lovely Ayak who writes about her life in Turkey, my second home, send me this. I am slightly scared that the only thing that is heartfelt is the need for the fruit and nut toblerones and the David. Note to self, be less shallow.


Then my little cup of cyber joy continues to overflow when the very lovely Mrs Boo, who delights me with her witty and stylish proper writing send me this, again not really deserved as I think I should get a medal for getting 3 posts a week out, quite often herself will do that in a day, I am an absolute slacker compared to her.



and the very lovely Becky, another proper writer who puts me to shame gave me this.


I have to give you some honest facts, I feel almost certain I cannot have anything left at all that you don't know, I give you way too much honest stuff, remember the one about the grey hair, oh dearie me.

Hot Boy and I are going to get a tattoo together, this is completely his idea, I'm not sure if we are doing feet or arse, no difference at all. Yes, I agree it's slightly weird to go get a tattoo with your daughter's boyfriend.

I have a very Scottish surname, I get really pissed off when people don't spell it correctly. It starts MacK and goes on. After having a child at that school for 8 feckin years, I returned Beautiful Baby Daughters report card with the correct spelling of her name in red pen, I actually wanted to write it on the teacher's forehead. I hate saying M a c capital K, but I do, over and over again.

I hate my legs, with a passion, I hardly ever wear skirts.

I am scared to do twitter

I am thinking of organising a big bloggy meet up, I've been lucky enough to meet some of you already and Libby, you will never get rid of me now, we are friends forever, no back backers. If I do, will you all come?

I am officially the worst singer in the world, bar none.

I get mildly stressy until I've reached my destination, I worry about missing planes.

Despite the blogging, I am extremely private and even secretive by nature, it's the anonymity thing that makes it easy to put my stuff out there.

I worry about my future, quite a lot, I earn a pittance and my stay at home fit my life round the kids life didn't set me up well for a healthy financial future post divorce.

Despite all the low level worries and crap life throws at me, I'd still rather have my life than anyone elses and I am supremely and utterly grateful for my life because I have it and I'm living it. Remind me of that if I start to bump my gums too much.

I'll probably be packing up to get home by the time you read this, so wish me a lovely last few days and I'll give you some gratuitous holiday porn when I get back.

I thank you...

I have been awarded some nice new bloggy bling which are now up on my cybershelf of nice things. This lovely one from Mrs W.

On this new template it's less clear than the old pink, but I promise you if you clink on the names, by the magic of the bloggy hyperlinking fairy she will take you immediately to these good people's blogs.

Now I need to tell you 7 things I'd rather not tell you. Jeez, this is hard, you know how fat, skint, old and boring I am, I share everything with you.

1. I'd rather not tell you that I accepted a man to be my friend on facebook purely because he was nice looking, we only have 1 friend in common and that's a blog friend so I have never ever met him.

2. I'd rather not tell you what I would do to David Tennant if I got the chance.

3. I'd rather not tell you about my very quick date with the man with the worst teeth in the world.

4. I'd rather not tell you about my few dates with a semi famous comedian and how this relationship is slightly teetering because I think I am funnier than he is. Despite the fact he gets paid and people turn up to see him.

5. I'd rather not tell you about how my very first ex still texts me and still wants to see me and do stuff he used to do to me.

6. I'd rather not tell you that I'd quite like him to, because he was good, far too good.

7. I'd rather not tell you that I feel extremely guilty about this because I don't actually like him very much.

Moving swiftly on, this lovely one came from Tuppence


Please feel free to take either of the awards and do either the tag if you're brave enough. My lovely friend Mae asked me weeks ago for my ten favourite things, I'm not counting family and friends as I'd fill my ten with them alone so other than that, in no particular order

1 Sunshine
2 A good book
3 Live music
4 Live comedy
5 Pink fizzy
6 Being thin enough to fit into your jeans
7 Kisses, especially on the neck or back
8 Looking forward to a Saturday night out
9 The internet, where would I be without it?
10 Rum and raisin ice cream

And last but not least a great big thank you to the lovely, lovely reader who nominated me for a Mads award, Sally from the mads popped in to tell me that I have been nominated for mad Blogger of the year and funniest mad blog, well my life is quite mad but it's only fecking funny when you're not living it! But to the person who could be arsed to log on and vote, tapadh leat (thank you) You are truly very kind and I appreciate the gesture, muchly x

7 Best Gigs

I was given a really lovely "I heart your blog award" from the really lovely Really Rachel Unfortunately I can't show it as it says that my image is corrupt and yes, that is the first time anyone's ever used that phrase about me.

The award comes with a meme of 7 things. There have been 7 things missed about the UK - erm I'm still here, 7 personality traits - well you've heard them all before, everybody knows how weird I am, 7 songs on your ipod and Rachel gave us 7 long lost songs.

So I have to find a 7 for you. Without further ado, may I present my...

7 Best Gigs

The Stranglers - Glasgow Apollo 23rd November 1981 - my first gig and it has to be there because of that. It cost £3.50 and I earned the money from babysitting. I went with my first boyfriend who was called Alan Osprey, nickname Ospur, he was tall, dark hair, blue eyes and looked like Robin Cousins. Oh how I loved him. I wore a black shirt belonging to him, his leather bikers jacket, a black pvc rara skirt, fishnet tights and Dr Martin boots. My hair was severely backcombed and hairsprayed into a Siouxsie spike and I had lashings of black eye liner and also the black lippy and nail polish, yes my mother was very proud. I can't remember who supported them but was overgiddy with delight to be there, Ospur and I had chips afterwards and snogged all the way home on the bus. Bliss.

Simple Minds- Meadowbank 12th August 1989 - my 23rd birthday, I went with a big crowd of friends and as we walked along the London Road from where our flat was in Easter Road, we were passed by Jim Kerr and the band in a black limo as they travelled to the gig after being at the Hibernian ground. I loved Simple Minds and I got lifted onto the shoulders of the aptly named Big Rab (he's 6 foot 7) for a fair bit of it so had a good view. Only time I've ever been able to walk home after a gig, we had a party at our flat afterwards as well.

Runrig- Loch Lomond 22nd June 1991 - a beautiful day in a beautiful setting. Supported by The Big Dish and The Hothouse Flowers and others. Listening to the HF singing "I can see clearly" whilst looking down over the loch with the sun glinting on it is a fantastic memory. And to hear the 50,000 strong crowd join in with "Loch Lomond" for their final song and all the fireworks afterwards was an unmissable experience.

Texas- Nottingham 10th October 2005 - because it's the only time I've ever heard her sing live. She was out of this world, the finest voice of all time. Sad she didn't sing my favourite but her version of the Scissors Sisters "Take your Mama" was the highlight of a set that didn't have a duff note in it. She is unsurpassed.

The Killers- Dublin 21st August 2008 - my very favourite gig of all time. I love this band, the Beautiful Eldest Daughter and I had a fantastic time at Marlay Park, their first song that night was "For Reasons Unknown" which is the song I most identify with, my own personal theme tune and I would have paid all the money it took to get there just to hear that 1 song. They were utterly brilliant. We went back to see them in Belfast 6 months later and if anything the set was better but the atmosphere in Marlay Park couldn't be bettered so this gig wins.

Primal Scream- Nottingham 27th November 2008 - because it's the only gig I have ever missed most of. We arrived during "Rocks" which was the final song but we did get the 4 song encore and that was worth it. I would love to go see them again for the full gig. One of the funniest nights I've had in years.

Manic Street Preachers- Camden 29th May 2009 - fabulous gig, NB and I got really near the front, the band were great - I'd almost forgotten how good they were and how much I liked them, there was a fight right beside me and a drunken Irishman leaped a tube barrier on the way home to tell me I was beautiful. All in a day's work.

So there you have it, my 7 best gigs. Please feel to take the "I love your blog" bling off someones elses non corrupt image and have a go with your 7. You all know your auntie loves you.

As others see us

Lots of my lovely blog matey's have made it into the top 100 British Mummy Blogger awards,so take a bow Tim, Mob, NB and Working Mum, and lots more that I read but don't know (vitually) if I've forgotten to applaud any other blog matey, I apologize.

When looking at my google searches (what ?, I have no life, I don't watch telly and I need something to keep me occupied)) I thought that despite me knowing that my life is all about being a Mummy, maybe others don't actually see me as a Mummy type figure.

When I look at the Google searches that bring the unwary to me, I get an inkling as to why. They mainly seem to be about curse words and tell offs, Milf's and blow jobs.

I can't imagine why I didn't make the cut !!!!!

Addictions and Awards

Your auntie has had a wee bit bling bestowed upon her by the very facinating with a fascinator Flick at Dusting Spiders.

I have to tell you of my 5 addictions, there are lots of things in my life I adore but these are things (not people) that I could not bear to have in my life daily.

The Internet - I spend way too much time online, blogging, emailing, researching work stuff etc, I read loads of horoscopes too, I know I'm a sad article.

Coffee - I drink way too much, at home it's instant Marks and Spencer Fairtrade gold roast. In Starbucks it's venti skinny latte with cinnamon on or in summer venti coffee light frappucino. I am overly happy if someone else makes it for me.

Love - completely and utterly, my name is auntiegwen and I am a big fat love junkie.

Reading - my mammy taught me when I was 3 and I've never given up reading, can always be found with at least 2 books on the go and love my book group. At present reading Marian Keyes "This Charming Man" Fiona Neill "The Secret Life of a Slummy Mummy" and I should be reading the Barak Obama autobiographies as book group is on the 4th and I've to read both of his !

High heels - I always wear high heels, every single day, I do not possess a pair of flat shoes. This is because I am tiny, about 5 foot 3, but strangely I only seem to date tall men. Only once have I dated someone less than 6 foot. So I am completely addicted to my heels, I have been known to photograph new ones on my phone, I even show them to people, much to their bemusement. I can give good shoe porn should you be interested...

So my lovelies, I can't pick 5 of you, I don't want to hurt anyones feelings, so feel free to do the tag and take the bling because I love reading all your blogs.

auntiegwen loves you

I know I'm crap at awards, people are incredibly kind at giving me them and I never reciprocate. That's bad, I'm usually better at giving than receiving.

So here it is, chock full of love from your auntie, this award is for anyone who pops in to visit their auntie, has been kind enough to comment and for the lovelies listed who have adorned their auntie with bling, in no particular order
Lisa, Tom Foolery, Mean Mom, Mom or Mum wars, Mobs, A Confused Take That Fan, DJ Kirby, Working Mum, That Girl and if I've left anyone out, I apologize and I know some of you are multiple givers.

If you don't have an award, please let mine be the first. I absolutely love being part of the community of bloggers, I now know people from all over the world and have insights into all kinds of things that would have passed me by. There have been striking similarities in lives lived an ocean apart and I love hearing how others are getting through theirs. I have made friends who can pick up nuances from what I write and will take time out of their life to email and offer support, so take a bow Lisa, Shirley, Sue, Penelope, you have dried some virtual tears and send lots of cyber hugs.

I always think I have an overwhelmingly female readership and I always applaud the power of female friendship but in the last wee while I have had some men who pop in from time to time, I also have some male bloggers I speak to off blog, I know, I can't believe it either, they're rubbish at discussing lip gloss though. So I want you to know I appreciate you visiting such a pink blog.

So again, I thank you for putting up with me bumping my gums about my weans, my complete inability to be a grown up and how if I were in charge of the world it would be a much better place.

Most of all thank you for giving me a voice.

A Great Big Thank You

I would like to say thank you to everyone who visits here.

My blog has been one of the most fun things I have ever done in my life. It has provided me with interaction with adults whilst being at home with the children. It has allowed me to try and clarify my thoughts and feelings. It's given me the chance to share the little funny things that the children have done that you would normally share with your partner. I hope that when they are older and they do read this, they will see just how essential they are to me, just as the air that I breathe is and how much they are loved. I've had insight into other people's views and opinions. I've been privileged enough to see into other people's lives and enjoy their ups and try and see them through their downs. I've made friends from all over the world. I've learned, I've laughed and cried too but for me it has been an overwhelmingly positive experience.

I know of people who have been given written warnings at work because of their blog even though they haven't mentioned it by name, I've seen nasty comments written on posts and I've seen people profoundly hurt by blog/real life cross over. I've been very fortunate in that my experience has been so good but I think that is the case for most of us bloggers.

My blog/real life cross over is limited, my children don't read it, my ex husband doesn't know I do it, I think some friends know I have it but have not been sufficiently interested to read it. So I only have a few people who know the regular me and the blog me, I have my mate the Edge who has known me for at least 180 years and he encouraged me to do it, I have my friend Sixy who is so funny and sweet, I have IT GOD who now knows more than he wanted to and wishes he hadn't bloody found it and I wonder if from time to time someone I used to date drops by, I know I would find the temptation irresistible if he had a blog, I'd have definitely kept reading, if you do Ken, please say hello.

The real kind of point to this is to say thanks for being with me. I've been blogging for about 18 months now and over that time I've been given awards. Due to my sheer technological numptiness and general can't be arsed to learn how to ness I've never put them on my blog and for that reason also I don't have a favourites list. It's not that I don't appreciate them, honest. So I have a little cyber drawer of nice things that include

A Rocking Girl Blogger award from Lisa

A Courageous Blogger award from Newfie ( who has disappeared and I often worry if she's ok)

A Busy Bee award from Tom Foolery

An Arte De Pico award again from Tom Foolery

An award of my choice from a selection at Mean Mom ( I loved the heart one but I worry that I wouldn't be able to link it back to her and you need the sentiment with the award) so I'll go for the nice one, I am often described as nice, I prefer edgy, but I can go with nice.

An award of my choice from MOB, I'd like to take the funny one, I get described as funny sometimes too, and sexy, that really surprises me, I never think of myself as sexy. Sorry, tmi again.

So in a poor attempt at coherence and a round up between my last post and this post, in my week without the weans I am going to attempt to put my awards on my blog, have different and appropriate music play to accompany the posts, learn to do the click on this word thingy and add a list of my favourite reads. That will take the whole week but the upshot is I can stay in my pyjamas and eat crap. I, sad article that I am, am really looking forward to doing this.

So, once again, thank you for being part of my life and thank you for letting me into yours. My day to day existence is so much the richer for it.